Who Knows

I haven't posted anything of significance in a while and this probably won't be anything important either. I haven't been feeling well. This "round" of depression has been tough. It has sustained itself with one event after another. I haven't had a chance to catch my breath. And it's not over yet. If nothing else happens, I estimate this should be gone, for the most part, in a couple of days. It sure is tiring. And I'm scaring people. I really shouldn't talk (or write!) to people when I'm in this "place." But I do... Somehow I think writing about it and letting people see that side of it helps inform them. It's almost impossible to describe depression and anxiety in words, so maybe if people get to see some of the turbulence of it, they'll get an idea. And who knows... Maybe those people will be able to help someone else and it'll just keep going. You never know. Or, maybe my words will just fall to the back log of Internet space and never be read or used. Who knows. Who knows.

For the most part, everything is okay in my world. I haven't really done much the past few days, but I'm slowly trying to get out a little bit. Baby steps.

It's funny, though, really... I've been dealing with "fate" -- it seems Fate and Destiny have taken an active part in my life... They're forcing me to make decisions I normally wouldn't make. They gave me two days to rethink a situation... I really can't explain it here, but let's just say, there's more to it than coincidence. I've always said there is some system to the universe and I believe it... You can call it God, god, Allah, Destiny, Karma, or Mary Jo -- Call it whatever you please, but there is something floating in the air that moves things along...